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Hitting Too Close to Home 
14th-Nov-2012 09:21 am
Title: Hitting Too Close to Home
Masterpost: We're All Part of a Chemical Equation
Characters/Pairing: Gerard Way/Frank Iero, Ray Toro, Bob Bryar, Mikey Way, Brendon Urie, Pete Wentz, Patrick Stump, Mark Pellegrino, Samantha Ferris, Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, Jim Beaver, Traci Dinwiddie, Robert Wisdom, Kate Cassidy, Richard Speight Jr., Alona Tal, Lauren Cohan, Chad Lindberg, Kurt Fuller, Rob Benedict, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Samantha Smith, Lindsey McKeon, Matt Cohen, James Patrick Stuart
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 2702 (this chapter), ~52K and counting for entire series.
Warnings: Frerard, slash,cursing, hurt/comfort, angst, war, violence, mentions of rape, science fiction, war, discrimination, minor character death
Notes: Futuristic fic, MCR, band slash, Supernatural RPF
Disclaimer: The lovely boys (ex/current members) of My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy and Panic! At the Disco do not belong to me. Neither do the cast of Supernatural...no matter how much I want them to. Scientific information in this story is based on 50% fact and 50% imagination.
Summary: Richard is upset with Frank's decision.



frankcmind frankcmind.jpg

Monday, May 23th, 2112

“Say that again?” Richard almost choked on his coffee. Richard had just logged onto Sunset, and Frank was having his usual daily conversation with Richard.

“Uh... Professor Gerard Way just became the co-supervisor for my FYP project.” Frank said warily.

For a full whole minute, Richard was rendered completely speechless.

If the situation wasn’t so serious, Frank would have pumped his fist in success. This was the first time he had ever seen Richard at a total loss for words.

Five, four, three, two, one…

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND?” Richard exploded. “Are you stupid or ARE YOU STUPID?

Frank winced.

“You’re not giving me much choice, are you. Either way, I’m stupid.” Frank joked lamely, trying to lighten up the mood of the situation.

Richard shot him an utterly incredulous and disgusted look.

“Let me get this straight.” Richard began, his brown eyes blazing with fury. “Professor Gerard Way, who is a member of the Seniorum Concilium by the way, knows that you’re a Multiple. He knows about Mattie, and he knows about your ring. And now you’re going to WORK FOR THIS GUY?”

“Well… that’s not exactly how I’ll put things, but yea… that sounds about right,” Frank said weakly.

“What the hell is wrong with you, Frank? You’ve been so careful these few years. It seems that you’ve lost your fucking mind after you've talked to this guy! You’re drawn to him like a motherfucking magnet! Are you really that obsessed with him?”

“Calm down, Richard, don’t forget that you’re still in the office.” Frank pleaded.

“I don’t give a shit, everyone else can go fuck themselves, I’m more concerned with the fact that my best friend is suicidal!” Richard snarled, leaning forward in his seat heatedly. “First you accidentally reveal what you are, and now you’re going to work for him? What was the point of going to all that trouble in keeping your identity a secret for all those years when you spill your guts out the moment you see a pretty face? And of all people, you chose to bare it all to a member of the Seniorum Concilium!”

“Oh fine, let the entire office know that your best friend is a Multiple! Fuck you, you selfish asshole!” Frank finally snapped, annoyed.

The angry look dissolved from Richard’s face, and he suddenly looked very guilty instead.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think… I just…” he sighed. “The rest of my colleagues are out for lunch, and I’m alone in my private office anyway,” Richard said, rubbing his forehead tiredly. “No one will be able to hear us.”

Frank shook his head.

“Fine, forget about that,” he said, holding his hands up in surrender, “I admit Professor Way is really gorgeous and all, but really Richard, I can’t believe you think I’m that shallow!” Frank said exasperatedly.

Richard opened his mouth to protest but Frank waved an impatient hand at him, and Richard fell silent once more.

“Come on, Richard, you’re blowing this way out of proportion! Professor Way was the one who pushed for the abolishment of the Anima Records. If anything, he understands my situation!”

“That’s what you think! He’s a complete stranger, for fuck’s sake. How can you have absolute trust in this guy? You barely even know him! You’re flirting with danger, Frank.”

“Richard, this whole thing isn’t even about him!” Frank sighed in frustration. “I didn’t approach him on purpose, because I was attracted to him or anything! I didn’t even know that working on the Cropiex Virus meant that I had to work with him. I only knew after Genevieve told me that if I really wanted to work on the project, I had to work with him because he was the only one in the entire school working on the virus! And by then, Genevieve was already so excited for me, and things just… kinda developed from there.”

“You could have just said no!” Richard responded fiercely.

 “I wanted to work with him because of my idea, my project. Can you imagine how wonderful it is to have two outstanding scientists telling me that my idea is brilliant and my project is feasible? If it works, it could mean a potential breakthrough in the field, and I want to be a part of that experience. Sure, I may be being a little too optimistic now, and the project may not work out in the end, but I really, really want to try it, Richard. Don’t you understand?” Frank pleaded. “I have a chance to finally be able to do something useful for once, and I want to put in my best for something that I’ve come up with all on my own!”

“I understand your point… but… Frank, you’re going to get yourself killed. Sure, the Anima Records are expunged NOW… but you’ll never know. They could bring back the Records… and what are you going to do then, Frank? What will Professor Way do? He’s a member of the Seniorum Concilium… do you think he’s going to keep his promise to you then? Do you think he’ll break the law for you?”

“I can’t…” Frank threw his arms up in the air in desperation, “I just can’t miss this opportunity! I’ll never forgive myself if I do.”

Richard was silent for a long time. He was expressionless and Frank watched him carefully.

“You’re determined, aren’t you?” Richard finally said a few minutes later. “You really want to do this project with him?” he asked softly.

“Yes, I really do.”

“You’re not going to listen to anything I say, at this point in time,” Richard replied bitterly. “So why am I wasting my time trying to stop you then?” He ran a hand through his brown hair, his hazel eyes flat and dull with resignation and pain.

Frank recognized the tinge of hurt in Richard’s eyes.

“Richard… please… please. Can’t I have your support on this?” Frank pleaded, his voice cracking slightly. It took a lot to disturb Richard’s cheerful persona – and it was devastating that Frank had managed to hurt his best friend enough to make him look so upset.

Richard let out a little strangled snort of subdued laughter.

“I don’t think I can bear it. I don’t want to be the one to tell you “I told you so” in the end, Frank.” Richard closed his eyes and sighed heavily. “I’ve lost enough friends and family in the War. My brothers… I’ve watched them suffer for so long, Frank. I watched them die. I watched them walk to their own deaths.”

Richard opened his eyes, and Frank was hit with a heart-shattering wave of despair as Richard’s hazel eyes blinked back tears. “I can’t… I just can’t watch you do something like that. And smile while doing it. I… I can’t.”

“Just… take care of yourself… Alright?” Richard choked out. As he leaned forward to cut the connection, Frank caught sight of a single tear rolling down Richard’s cheek. The image above Frank’s Workstation went black and faded away as the line was disconnected. His Workstation fell silent.

Dammit.

He hadn’t meant to hurt Richard.

Frank wanted to scream. Instead, he slumped backwards onto his bed, covering his eyes with the back of his hand as his own eyes filled with angry and frustrated tears. Mattie chirped mournfully beside Frank as he wept. Mattie silently pressed his tiny body against Frank’s, hoping that his warmth would give Frank some comfort.

 frankcmind frankcmind.jpg

Richard leaned heavily back in his seat. He pressed his fingers tightly against his closed eyelids, letting out a soft moan of despair. He wished that he could stop the fucking tears, but he couldn’t. 

He was sick of crying. He hated being weak.

If Frank wasn’t going to listen to him, there was nothing else he could do. But he wouldn’t watch Frank do it.

He couldn’t do it.

He just couldn’t.

Watching his brothers send themselves to their own deaths was enough.

*

Saturday, 28th November, 2105 (Richard is 17)

Richard woke up when he heard a thump in the kitchen. He glanced out of the window, noting that it was still dark out.

He tensed, immediately alert as he tossed the covers aside, sitting up from his bed.

“Security check.” He said aloud.

“Secure.” Came the pleasant but slightly robotic female response.

“Good,” he mumbled under his breath. Perhaps he had imagined it after all.

There was another distinct thump from the kitchen and the faint screeching of a chair across the floor.

“Account.” He began testily. There was definitely someone else in the house apart from him. His father was away on a business trip with his mother and Michael, and they were not due home yet… at least, not this soon.

“Three in total.” The Security system replied.

“What?” Richard asked, confused. “Who?”

“Richard Speight Jr., Evan Speight and William Speight.”

His brothers! They were home! Richard’s heart soared in relief. He hadn’t seen them for years ever since they had joined the Rebellion in the War.

“Where’s Evan and William?”

“They are in the kitchen.”

Richard jumped out of his bed and hurried towards the kitchen.

He was hit by an overwhelming smell of blood even before he entered the kitchen. Oh god, he’ll never forget just how much blood there was.

“EVAN!” Richard cried out, rushing towards his brothers. Evan was lying on the floor, seemingly unconscious and looking pale from the blood loss. William was kneeling beside Evan, pressing some towels against the bleeding wound in his stomach. It seemed as though Evan was losing too much blood... his shirt was already soaked with blood.

"Shit." Richard kneeled down and reached out to touch Evan's chest. The feeling of his brother's heart beating a little faintly but steadily under his hand brought him a moment of instantaneous relief. He pressed a hand against Evan’s forehead, wiping away a stray hair from his sweaty face. “What happened?”

William grimaced. “We were betrayed. Ambushed. Evan tried to protect me and he was stabbed… Dammit, the bleeding isn’t stopping!” The blood had seeped through the towels.

Richard stumbled to his feet, “I’ll get more towels!”

“No need, baby bro.” The voice was barely a whisper.

Richard spun around, his eyes widening. “Evan!” He kneeled down beside Evan again. Evan’s cerulean eyes were gentle, and he reached up weakly to ruffle Richard’s hair lovingly.

“Hello, baby bro, long time no see. Looking good.”

“Why?? Why? You stupid sonofabitch!”

“We have the same mother, you dumbass,” Evan replied weakly, laughing a little. “I missed you, baby bro. Got a girlfriend yet?”

“Idiot,” Richard cursed his brother, laughing despite himself.

“True, you’re a Speight, I’m sure you've had half a dozen girlfriends already.” Evan grinned at Richard. His handsome face looked strained as he reached for Richard’s hands. He was suddenly solemn as he turned and looked at William as well. “The two of you take care of Mum and Dad when I’m not around, you hear?”

“Don’t say that,” Richard choked as his vision blurred with tears, “You’re going to be fine.”

William’s mouth tightened into a thin line as he stared evenly at Evan.

“I can’t do this without you, Evan,” William said, his hazel eyes teeming with worry. “We started this together… and we will end this together. Stay with me, little bro.”

“I never regretted fighting for us, William,” Evan said softly. His eyes brimmed with tears as he stared up at his elder brother. “Don’t stop fighting. We’ll be able to make a difference for Multiples.”

“Why didn’t the two of you listen to me?” Richard sobbed. “Why didn’t you just stay out of the stupid War? What am I going to do without you?”

 “Some things are worth fighting for, Richard.” Evan replied, pressing his hand firmly against Richard’s cheek and rubbing his tears away. “You’ll be fine. My baby bro is tough.”

“I hate you, you fucking asshole.” Richard said as he pressed his own hand against Evan’s tightly. He didn’t want to let go of Evan. He was afraid that the moment he did, Evan would be lost forever. He knew it was irrational, but he couldn’t help himself from leaning forward to pull Evan firmly into his embrace.

Evan chuckled.

“I love you too, baby bro.”

“You stupid fucker.” Richard shot back. He pressed his nose into the side of Evan’s neck, breathing in the familiar scent of his brother’s cologne.

"No, no, no. Not now. Please don't let me lose Evan when he's only just come home." Richard prayed desperately. He never believed in a higher power, but right now, he would have given his soul to the devil for his brother.

“I’m scared, Richard,” Evan admitted quietly.

Richard let out a soft moan of agony. Evan must be truly frightened for him to admit it to him. “I’m here. We’re here.” 

William reached over, running a hand over Evan’s chiseled face tenderly. He cupped the side of Evan’s cheek, and leaned down to kiss the top of Evan’s forehead.

“Yes, we're here.” William said gently as he held Evan’s hand in his own.

Richard gripped his brother tightly in his arms as he felt his brother growing weaker and weaker with the blood loss, watched as his once brilliant blue orbs lost their spark and grew duller with every passing moment.

He felt it the moment Evan finally died in his arms.

Richard would never forget how it felt like to feel Evan’s life expire in his arms.

The moment of realisation was so crushing and devastating that Richard couldn’t breathe every time he remembered it. Seven years later and he could still remember how it felt like to have Evan’s blood still warm and soaking through his clothing. He could still remember the moment when Evan’s body finally loosened and relaxed against Richard’s chest.

Richard howled in agony, giving in to the devastation that ricocheted from his heart to the rest of his body, threatening to devour him in its entirety.

“I swear…Evan…” William said, trembling as his hazel eyes finally flooded with tears. He stood up, rubbing the tears away from his face with the back of his hand, and sucked in a deep breath. He turned and started to walk out of the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” Richard asked, alarmed. He set Evan’s body gently onto the floor.

“I’m going to hunt down the fucking traitor.” William said flatly. “He will pay for what he did to Evan.”

“Please, William. Please.” Richard stood up and grabbed his brother tightly by the wrist. “Don’t go. I can’t… I just can’t watch you leave like that! Evan is… Evan is gone now; please don’t make me lose another brother!” Richard begged desperately.

“Don’t worry, baby bro. I’ll be home soon.” William reached over, ruffling Richard’s hair. His hand closed over Richard’s fingers, and he gently broke Richard’s grip on his hand. “I promise.”

Richard let out a snort of bitter laughter as he sank to his knees, defeated. If he couldn’t stop his two brothers from joining the Rebellion years ago, he would never be able to stop William from trying to take revenge now.

His brothers never listened to him.

He wished they did.

Dammit, he wished they did.

He crawled over to Evan’s body, placed his head over Evan’s immobile chest and sobbed bitterly as his eldest brother walked determinedly out of the kitchen without looking back.

*

William never kept his promise.


()

*

1) Richard's story was never meant to be written into the main story, but I felt it was necessary to show why Richard was so upset by Frank's decision. It reminded him too much of the past.

2) William Speight is the oldest son of the Speight family. He is 10 years older than Richard. The second in line is Evan, who is 8 years older than Richard. William and Evan were 27 and 25 years old respectively, when they died. Both were Multiples who were involved in the Rebellion of the Anima War. Michael, like Richard, is a Power with a single Anima. Michael is 6 years older than Richard who is the youngest of all the four brothers.


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